It’s not the blue of melancholia, nor is it the blue of frigid, icy waters surrounding some lovely Scandinavian fiord, nor is it the Muddy Waters kinda blues where somehow that wild and necessary music determines the arc of one’s life and experience. It’s a kind of...
Bill Clinton leads with his nose— always has and always will. Not that his nose really minds being the center of attention—the first one to enter a room or the first one to greet the onslaught of cameras as the press push closer in for another, better money shot of...
Before you, Teddy, there were no clever names for the president’s house, folks calling it The President’s Palace and the Executive Mansion—neither of which has any real descriptive character. Then you came along, the Trustbuster, the sickly boy who made good on his...
The story is legendary, and one would think where money is concerned, or even mentioned at all, one would find a swath of olive-green bills stacked high on the president’s desk, but The Buck Stops Here sign was in fact not green at all, but mahogany! This is a...
He had five of them—hats that is. Part cowboy, part fedora—they saw him through the presidency like stalwart protectors. They gave him confidence. They engendered a swagger. They saw him through the race riots, civil and civic unrest, and the anti-war protests that...
To be sure, George Washington was an honest fellow by all accounts, smart and upstanding, and yes, his father did buy him a hatchet when he was six years old—hoping perhaps his son might become a lumberjack, or at the very least, an arborist. Instead, Washington...
Orange is, what one might call, an unwitting participant in the steady brigade of mutant politicians strong-arming their way through Washington. One such behemoth is particularly “luminescent” like a psychotic azalea or a schizophrenic cantaloupe. Living deep inside...
John F. Kennedy’s back was almost as famous as he was, having survived the sinking of PT-109 and the saving of several fellow sailors for the freezing waters of the great Pacific. A true hero, Kennedy’s back was awarded the prestigious Navy and Marine Corps medal, but...
They say, “The eyes have it,” and what the “it” is exactly in this sentiment is debatable, yet no one can argue that Mamie Eisenhower’s baby blues rivaled the Atlantic and set more than a few hearts ablaze. The blue of her eyes was practically iconic and the tell-tale...
It’s no secret, Gerald Ford could throw, and his famed football remembers him fondly, so singular and ever so brown, careening across the Michigan sky. He ran the country the way he assembled the field—one play at a time and always with the endgame in mind, but his...
Stove Pipe Black has been known to be quite presidential. A lofty, serious shade, yet with an air of whimsy skirting the edges. Jet black is for racing cars and black pearl possesses a hint of green that can sometimes be found on iguanas, but Stove Pipe Black can be...
Maladjusted Magenta is a card-carrying malefactor, having graduated from the school of malefactions for the perpetually maleficent. Maladapted and malcontent, Maladjusted Magenta is both a true malcontent as well as an expert on all things malodorous—from rotten eggs...
The end of the world is upon us, according to Apocalyptic Apricot, whose outlook on life has been called bleak, grim, dreary, hopeless and downright cataclysmic. Proceeding from the standpoint that the entire planet is doomed and that if there is any “goodness” left...
She does! She really does! An integral part of the community, Rose Matters more than you might imagine. After all, where would we be without rose-colored glasses, rose hips tea, rose water or some child’s irresistible rosy cheeks in Buffalo New York in the dead of...
Meriwether Blue decided to become a nun and start her own order separate from the Archdiocese, but more aligned with the high-flying nuns of Costa Rica—those avid, though seldom seen, forest dwellers for whom the soul can only be awakened in accordance with the sky....
Savage Saffron is so much more than a condiment to spice up the rice. He is fearless and courageous, bold and unwavering in his resolve, but more importantly, he is truly authentic, a one-of-a-kind maverick whose influence on modern popular culture is quite...
Denouement Daffodil is a real downer and the first person to leave the party, proffering reasons like “I must go home and feed my guppies,” or “I can’t concentrate because my nose hairs are making me sneeze.” Always quick to wrap things up and never one for a winded...
It’s that time of year again, when the mistletoe has wilted and bedraggled Christmas trees line the city streets, slumped against dumpsters like drunken sailors. It’s that time of year when Resolute Red makes BIG plans, none of which will ever be realized, but it’s...
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