Tag: Underground cinema

In the late 1960s and into the ’70s an odd confluence of events made for some very curious cinema. Many stars that had become famous in the studio system were suddenly at loose ends to fend for themselves. At the same time, Hollywood was trying to get down with the whole “youth thing.” A mentality developed where the old fossils were cheaper by the dozen and a rush was on to see who could get the most old stars into a “hip” new movie. On the high end of this genre sits Casino Royale (1967) which managed to find ways to include Orson Welles, George Raft and John Huston in cameo roles. Lower on the totem pole sits Skidoo (1968), which succeeded in humiliating Groucho Marx, Carol Channing, Peter Lawford and Mickey Rooney. Both of these stand as camp classics but neither would be a serious candidate for the worst movie ever made. To many aficionados of horrible cinema, that honor belongs to an atrocity called The Phynx. Warner Archive is now offering this rarely seen gem as a made-to-order DVD.

One might rightfully call this monstrosity “too much too late.” By 1970, the whole Monkees genre of manufactured pop acts was an old idea. So too was the zany pacing that made A Hard Day’s Night seem so revelatory. Even the idea of rounding up the usual suspects was getting old. (In the ’70s this trend would continue with dramas like Airport 77, The Poseidon Adventure and Towering Inferno. These films were less intentionally camp.) One can only marvel at how this one was pitched, or who thought it was a good idea, so late in the game.

The plot (such as one exists) involves the CIA (or the military) forming a hit band (in the mold of ’60s pop acts) that will land an invitation to Albania, where “America’s national treasures” are being held captive. Once the group is formed and has been trained by the military, they are inspected by Dick Clark, announced by Ed Sullivan and awarded a gold record by James Brown. When their training is complete, it is time to meet their pent-up physical needs. This causes one of the weirdest lines ever uttered in a film: “The U.S. government is pleased to announce an orgy!”

Once they reach Albania (where the actual Colonel Sanders is serving chicken to Albanian royalty) the cameos come hot and heavy. Among the national treasures who are moved by the music of The Phynx to escape back to America are: Joe Louis, Butterfly McQueen, Trini Lopez, Martha Raye, Edgar Bergen and his famous puppet, Johnny Weissmuller, Rudy Vallee and Busby Berkeley. Further adding to the indignity of these old stalwarts is their escape from the castle in donkey carts full of radishes. Most of the speaking roles among the cameos occur in these carts, so a lucky few are subjected to the further torture of sitting three or four abreast and inanely chattering. While they do, The Phynx pass out guitars to the crowd, which they use to literally shatter the Iron Curtain.